He has what?

So after my mild panic attack at the clinic, we arrived at the hospital fourth floor, room 4111. I don’t think I will ever forget that room number.

After getting admitted, it was nice they came to us, no pesky waiting. It was all kind of surreal, they brought the Bestie, Gage and I food, and it was good! I don’t know what was more surprising the food being good or the fact we were at the hospital; for some unknown reason.

Finally after what felt like hours, but in hind sight was probably only thirty minutes, a pretty young doctor came in, we’ll call her Doctor B, she sat down and my world fell apart.

“Well, just from looking at the blood samples, I can tell you that it looks like leukemia-” at this point I have to interrupted the good Doctor B by asking the Bestie “Please remember everything she says, I maybe nodding, but as soon as she says anything I panic attack it right out of my brain; oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck this cannot be happening.

I’m going to interrupt myself here by saying that day my Bestie was my rock, my anchor to hold on to, if I’d have been by myself I don’t know what I would have done. I will forever be thankful she was there with me; I already loved her but this sealed the deal for eternal gratitude and love.
Ok back to Doctor B, “from what I can see, Gage has leukemia, but with more blood work will be able to determine which type and how advanced; we should have all that information on Friday.” as I dumbly sat there and just nodded, and saying stupid shit like “ok, Friday, ok” the Bestie asked relevant questions that I’m sure the Hubs and the rest of the family would want answers to. I don’t remember what she asked all I know, is I relied on her to answer any questions the family had, and she did; thank God for her.

As soon as the Doctor left I was on the phone with the Hubs, “Gage has leukemia, OMG OMG OMG Gage has leukemia!” me sobbing uncontrollably into the phone, with the help if the Bestie I was able to answer as many questions he had.

Why the fuck is it when you have the biggest news in the world to tell me people they never answer their Goddamn phone?? I just discovered my kid has leukemia where the hell are you people and why can’t you pick up?! This is why cell phones were created!!

3 responses to “He has what?

  1. Oh Lisa….I have no words other then I love you so.

  2. I just want to say that in July 1985 my life and world fell apart as well. My daughter was 10 months old when she was diagnosed with Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia. After 3 years of adult size doses of Chemo Therapy she was in remission for 1 year 6 months when she came out of remission. Another 3 years 6 months of Chemo. My daughter, on September 27, 2010 just celebrated her 26th birthday. On July 14, 2009 she blessed my with a grand baby, a boy. Keep your faith in God, I did.

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