the day before

On this day last year I was blissfully ignorant. I didn’t know that in less then 24 hours we would begin the battle for Gages life. That in a little more then a week I would be watching doctors rush around, trying to keep him alive.  I watched nurses and surgeons race him down to sugery not knowing of he would come back alive or not.

I spent all day today remembering our last “normal” wondering of I knew what I know now would I have changed how we spent the day? I can honestly answer, no, I’d do everything the same way. We went to a BBQ at our friends house, Gage road on a longboard with daddy for the first time, played with our friends new puppy Peddles we had an amazing day.

It was an amazing day. It was a normal day. A last day before chemo, lumbar punctures, bone marrow aspirations, pills and blood transfusions. Those our our normal days now.

I also remember I complained about Gage waking up every two hours at night and how moody and whiney he has become in the last few weeks. He seemed to be crying for no reason, I could not figure it out what was wrong.

Little did I know, the waking up every two hours, the moodiness, the crying and most importantly the bruising I attributed to a clumsy toddler learning to walk were all signs pointing to acute lymphoblastic leukemia.

After dwelling on August 1, 2010 all day today I can honestly say, we had a perfect day and I would not have changed it for the world.

4 responses to “the day before

  1. Congrats on making it thru the year Mama. Keep on fighting the great fight as u are doing now kiddo. What a year, whew!

  2. Yay! So glad ur blogging again! Congrats on making it thru this year and huge fight! We love u all!

  3. Insane that it’s been a year. You have all battled and look where you are: Mother fuckin remission baby! Your strength constantly amazes me my friend. I know that this year has been full of very un-perfect days, days you didn’t think you could get through but knew that fighting with Gage was the only option. You never accepted anything less than making sure your son was taken care of the best way possible, not only by his doctors but by his mommy as well. You have done an amazing job and before we know it, there will be a post about 5 years ago and pics of Gage in kindergaten, healthy as a horse. I love you guys so much.

  4. You are so brave Gage! Wow what a Mama too!

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